Never Too Far (Chapter 18)


Bethy reached over and squeezed my hand. She was standing beside me as I sat on the doctor's table waiting. I'd peed in a cup and now we waited to hear the official results. My heart was racing. There was a slim possibility that I might not be pregnant. I hadgoogled it last night. The home pregnancy tests could have been wrong and I could have been getting sick because my head thought I was pregnant.

The door opened and a nurse walked in. She was smiling as she glanced from Bethy to me. "Congratulations. It's positive. You're pregnant."

Bethy's hand squeezed my tighter. I'd known this deep down but just hearing the nurse say it made it more real. I would not cry. My baby didn't need to know that I'd cried when I found out I was pregnant. I wanted him or her to always feel loved. This was not a bad thing. It could never be a bad thing. I needed family. I would soon have one again. Someone who loved me unconditionally.

"The doctor will be in to check things out in a few minutes. We need to do blood work too. Have you been experiencing any cramping or bleeding?"

"No. Just really sick. Smells set me off," I explained.

The nurse nodded and wrote that down on her clipboard. "It may not feel like it but that's a good thing. Being sick is good."

Bethy snorted. "You've not seen her dry heaving. Nothing is good about that."

The nurse smiled. "Yeah, I can remember those days. That isn't fun." She shifted her gaze to me. "Will the father be involved?"

Would he? Could I tell him? I shook my head. "No, I don't think he will be."

The sad smile on the nurse's face as she nodded and made another note on her clipboard told me she saw this too often.

"Where you using any form of birth control when you conceived? The pill maybe?" the nurse asked.

I didn't look at Bethy. Maybe I didn't want her in here afterall. I shook my head.

The nurse raised her eyebrows. "Nothing?" she asked.

"No, nothing. I mean we used a condom a couple of times but there was a couple times we didn't. He pulled out once… but once he didn't."

Bethy tensed beside me. I knew what she was thinking. How could I have been so stupid? That had been one fact I'd left out of the story.

The nurse nodded. "Okay. The doctor will be in shortly," she replied and stepped out of the room.

Bethy jerked on my arm causing me to look at her. "He didn't use a condom? Is he crazy? Dammit! He should've thought to ask you if you were pregnant. What a douche bag. Here I was feeling sorry for him because he doesn't know he's gonna be a papa and he didn't use a damn condom. He should have been contacting you in four weeks to make sure you weren't pregnant. What an idiot."

Bethy was pacing in front of me now. I just watched her. What did I say to this? I was just as wrong in the situation. I'd been the one to strip naked, climb on top of him and fuck his brains out that night. He'd been a guy and the last thing on his mind had been stopping to put on a condom. I hadn't given him much time to think. But sharing the details of mine and Rush's sex life with Bethy wasn't going to happen. So I kept my mouth shut.

"He deserves this. He should have checked on you. Don't tell the jackass. He thinks he can use that thing and not put a jacket on it then he can live in ignorance for all I care. I'll be here for you. Me and you. We got this." Bethy looked ready to take on the world at the moment. It made me smile. I wouldn't be in Rosemary when the baby was born. I wish I could be. I wanted my baby to have someone else to love it. Bethy would make an excellent aunt. The thought made me sad. My smile disappeared.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you," Bethy said dropping her hands from her waist with a concerned look on her face.

"No. You didn't. I just wish… I just wish I didn't have to leave. I want my baby to know you."

Bethy walked over and wrapped her arms around my shoulders and squeezed. "You will tell me where you live and I'll come see the two of you all the time. Or you could stay and live with me. When the baby is born Rush is bound to be gone. He doesn't stay in Rosemary past the summer. We'd have time to get you two settled into life before he came back. Just think about it. Don't worry over any final decisions right now."

Would Rush leave? Would he give up on me and leave Rosemary? Or would he stay? My heart hurt thinking of him walking away from me. As much as I knew it wouldn't work I wanted him to fight for me. I wanted him to find a way that we could be together even if I knew it was impossible.

Two hours later we were back at Bethy's apartment and I had prenatal vitamins and several pamphlets about having a healthy pregnancy. I tucked them away in my suitcase. I needed a warm bath and a nap.

Bethy knocked once on the bathroom door and walked inside. She was holding her phone in one hand and smiling like an idiot. "You're not going to believe this," she paused and shook her head like she was still in disbelief. "Woods just called. He said the condo is ours for the same cost I am paying now on this apartment. He said it's a job perk since having two of his employees on the club grounds will be helpful. He also said we would both be without a job if we tried to decline his offer."

I sank down onto the closed toilet seat and stared up at her. He was doing this because I was pregnant. This was his way of helping out. I wanted to scream at him and hug his neck all at one time. Tears stung my eyes. "Is he still on the phone?" I asked when I realized Bethy was still holding it close to her ear.

"No this is Jace. He said this has to do with you. You aren't… like seeing him or anything are you?" she asked slowly. That must have been Jace's question. She was repeating it like she didn't believe it even as she said it.

"Can you mute the phone?" I asked her quietly.

Her eyes went wide and she nodded. Once it was safely muted she stared at me like she didn't recognize me. What did she think? I was leading Woods on while I was pregnant with Rush's baby? Surely not. "Bethy, he knows. Woods knows."

Realization dawned on her and her mouth dropped open. "How?" she asked.

"He put me on the morning shift in the dining room. The kitchen… it smelled like bacon."

Bethy made a big "o" with her mouth and nodded. She got it. She reached up and unmuted her phone. "There is nothing going on with Woods and Blaire. He has just become a friend of hers and wants to help out. That's all."

Bethy rolled her eyes at something Jace said then called him crazy and hung up. "Okay, so he knows you're pregnant with Rush's baby and he's giving us a condo for dirt cheap? This is like the best thing ever. Wait until you see this place. If he lets us stay after the baby is born your room is plenty big enough for a crib! It's perfect."

I couldn't think that far ahead. Right now I just needed to go find Woods and talk to him. If I did leave in four months I didn't want this deal to go away for Bethy. I needed to make sure of that before I let her get too excited.